Tody's ashes

We lost Tody a year ago January. She was one of my closest friends - we met at Purdue oh so many years ago and the bond that formed that year in the middle 70s was strong. Tody, Candi, Cyndie and Mary Jane - we still get together almost every year. That bond is still strong. Tody was going to visit me here in Rwanda - we had just started making plans when a cerebral aneurysm took her while she was skiing in Colorado. This February some of Tody's ashes were lovingly spread in Colorado on those slopes by Jeannie and Rick, Tody's brother and sister-in-law, along with Mary Jane and Bruce, Margaret and Sally. A fitting place for her ashes to be released.

Candi made a wonderful CD of music for all of us this February, in remembrance of Tody - music has a way of transporting us through time and space, and Tody LOVED music. Since I was still in Rwanda, Candi put the CD in the mail - all the way to Rwanda. I even marked my calendar so I would know to look for it at the little post office down the street – everything takes about 35 days to get here from the US. But the date came and went – no CD from Candi. March and April passed... I’ve learned to be patient here so I waited some more. I traveled back to Indiana for the month of May. I talked to Candi when I got home, and she learned that for some strange reason the CD she tried to send me was held up in Kansas City! Of all places! Not Addis Ababa, Nairobi, Entebbe. Nope, in Kansas City. Go figure. So Candi made another copy for me, and sent it to Indianapolis. When it arrived, I played the CD from beginning to end, sitting on our couch in the family room with my eyes closed. Remembering. Singing out loud. Transported through time and space to our dorm room. Our apartment on Fowler. Our trips visiting one another over the years. Remembering Tody, remembering our friendship and fun times together. Remembering me all those years ago. Remembering who I am at my core.

Then I came back to Rwanda in early June. When I walked into my office there were two packages about the size of a CD sitting on my desk. One was from Candi, and one from Mary Jane. The CD had finally arrived from Kansas City! The other was my portion of Tody’s ashes. I had forgotten that they were coming for me to spread here in Rwanda. I just sat for a bit at my desk and gently held the package in my hands. Tody. Here in Rwanda at last. The package sat on my desk for about 3 weeks - I was wildly busy and wanted to wait until the right moment to release the ashes. The right place and a good, peaceful frame of mind for me.

Last week I was in Rumangabo. One of the most beautiful places on earth. It is in Congo, and is the park headquarters for the Virunga National Park. I brought the package - sitting comfortably next to my computer while I took care of a sick baby gorilla. The gorilla got better, and as I sat in my tent that night I again held the little package and thought about Tody - I would have brought her here when she visited and she would have LOVED it. Rumangabo is beautiful, exotic, and a little risky - yes, she would have loved it! But it still didn't feel quite right to me, so the package went back into the computer bag.

Last evening I went to a place called Virunga Lodge - way up on the top of a hill here in Rwanda, with a perfect view of all 6 volcanoes. One of the other most beautiful places on earth. Stunning really. As I was walking back to the truck after speaking to some visitors, the night was cool, the stars were shining, and the half moon was casting long shadows. It felt good. I felt good. I stopped by a small table and chairs that served as a rest spot for people who wanted to admire the view. And I gently opened the package and released Tody's ashes. I could see them lightly sprinkled over the foliage, bright in the moonlight. I smiled through tears - she smiled too I'm sure.